As of March 1st Persephone is 4 Months old!
Hey ladies...
Holy crap, I did not think I was going to make it this far. My anxiety and depression are still around and still kicking my ass but in many ways things are looking up. I have to say a lot of what is making me feel better is the fact that my baby is awesome and now that she is more interesting and less lump like I can enjoy the crap out of her.
Sleep:
Effie is a damn good night time sleeper, however we have started to have some bumps which I believe to be mostly developmental. She stopped taking a binkie at bedtime which means she can take a little longer to go down. We have always put her to bed awake... we didn't actually know to rock her to sleep or feed her to sleep and so she's always kind of done it herself. However, now she fusses a bit before going down, not a full blown cry just a bit of fussing. She sleeps usually about 11.5-12.5 hours at night with no feedings. She will sometimes cry at 5ish without actually waking up. And then recently has started doing the same thing about an hour after going to sleep. She cries but doesn't ever open her eyes and will drift back to sleep only to cry 2 minutes later. This has been really hard for me as I get very anxious and I have no idea what to do for her. I try to go in and comfort her and nothing works, in fact it will make it worse instead. I'm hoping she grows out of it!
Alex is now in charge of bedtimes. I do stuff, but her determines how we do everything and is mostly on night duty but can wake me up if needed (I always wake up). But to help with my own night wakings and insomnia I have started wearing ear plugs, it helps a little. Alex also puts her to bed by himself at least once a week and we are increasing that to 2-3 times so that I have time to write my thesis. (He's the best)
Naps are pretty much the same and suck. She goes down for them but usually only sleeps for 45 minutes. Everything I've read is that this is just what they do. I have tried every nap extension trick ever and none of them work. However the friend that watches her on Fridays always gets awesome naps, which drives me nuts. She usually takes 4 naps a day.
We are leaning towards dropping the swaddle and I am scared.
She was fake napping in this picture. So was I.
Health:
No sickness *knocks on wood*. When we went in for her 4 month shots she had a few really bad days after, sleeping and eating weird, fussy, and a low grade fever. I managed to get through that with only one panic attack (GO ME). Stats: 16lbs 1oz (82%), 25 inches long (70%), and some giant ass head measurement that I didn't write down. She is my giant rolly polly lovie.
Eating:
Persephone is formula fed. I might at some point write about breast feeding, but there are also a million people who have written about it before me. It's hard, harder with PPD/PPA and expensive to get help. She eats about 28-ish oz a day and is on sensitive formula (because that is what Alex bought when we first came home from the hospital).
Our pediatrician said that Effie has enough head control that we can start solid food at anytime. Then I read a bunch of articles that said DON'T DO IT TILL 6 MONTHS. So I think we are waiting, I don't see the harm in waiting.
Milestones:
Persephone rolled! For like a day and then a few times after that front to back, but she doesn't do it consistently. I got the first one on video! She can almost go from back to front but gets stuck on her arm. She smiles waaay more and has started laughing and vocalizing. It is my FAVORITE THING. It makes the days easier and so much fun. It also makes it harder to leave the house.
The first three months were super hard, both emotionally and physically. In many ways I feel like we are all starting to get in to our groove.
This is her 3 month picture!
Congratulations on reaching the 4th month of mamahood! I'm glad to hear you're all feeling like you're finding your groove. After spending so long in the "fog," when you feel like nothing will ever be normal again, it can feel like such a relief to find your footing now and again. As for feeding, I swear sometimes you're telling my own story. My son was also exclusively formula fed after the first month due to BF issues, an on the Gentlease stuff because the regular upset his tummy. I know you feel like a million other moms have already talked about BFing, but your own story is important, too. Every journey is unique. Thanks for continuing to share yours.
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